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First off, there’s no chance Kobe actually ends up getting traded. For all the obvious reasons (can’t get fair value, Laker fans would riot, IT’S KOBE FUCKING BRYANT)….but since some people (most notably all the jackasses in the media) seem to be living in a fantasy land acting like its a possiblity, I figured I’d throw out my own fantasy trade:

Kobe to Seattle for Rashard Lewis and the #2 Pick (Kevin Durant)

That way the Lakers could run my dream smallball/bigball (its literally both things at the same time aka the Fucking Shit) lineup of Odom at the Point, Durant at the 2, Walton at the 3, Lewis at the 4 and Bynum at the 5.

A bunch of 6’9 Beasts running around with Bynum mixed in there just for some size on defense. I really don’t give a fuck who the center is. I’m not 100% sure that the above team would even need a center. I’m down with 4 on 5. More room on offense to operate and defense would be solved with a solid box zone. We’ll let Phil figure out the details. One option would be to get rid of Bynum for another 6’9 beast so he’s not out there F’ing up the perfect team.

But back to reality. Kobe’s not getting traded and the Lakers have to do something. The problem is that J O’neal is the most likely target, but the Pacers want Odom and Bynum which is retarded considering Odom is the best player of the three and Bynum’s not even 20 and would probably be the best center in the East in 3 years. If you’re trading both Odom and Bynum, it better be for fucking KG.

The key is trading Bynum for someone good enough to make the Lakers legit contenders. This side of Greg Oden, hes the best young true center in the league (DHoward is a 4/5) . The kid is legit and has a lot of trade value, and in another lifetime, I would hate to trade him away. But at this point, something has to be done and trading Bynum is the only thing that will make things work out for the best.

And finally, you can’t really blame Kobe for being so adamant about trading Bynum; how would you feel if your team hinged its franchise hopes on a 19 year old Tracy Morgan?

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One last reminder why the Lakers will never trade Kobe away:

And who says Kobe doesn’t inspire his teammates?

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